A Side Note:

21 Apr

Sarah is working like no other to finish the changes we’ve made to our new site. Thus, I am the only one posting for the time being and I am currently traveling abroad in a lovely little place called Dublin which limits me slightly due to the time difference and the fact that I am frolicking all over the damn place. I will hopefully bring some travel inspired posts with some shitty digi camera pictures. IT’S GOING TO BE GREAT. But that being said we’re sorry the posting is not as hard-core as it normally is. Once our new site improvements are up and running, though, things will be back to normal. Until then enjoy our brief posts and we’ll be missing you desperately in the mean time.

The “You’re Undateable” List:

20 Apr

There are some fashion faux pas that make guys completely undateable.**

Escuchame, I may be able to help you. Women will judge you on how you look in the first 10 to 15 seconds they see you. If you’re dressed like a fool, you already lost out. The only thing that might be able to save you now is beer googles, but let’s be serious; once those wear off you’re right back where you started. So-lo.

Chinese takeout for one, please? Oh, awkward you gave me two chopstick sets thinking I’d have someone to share this with….. but yet, I am alone.

BUT WHY? It could be the way you look. I’ve posted about this before. So here are some other things you need to avoid at all times and definitely at all costs.

DO NOT:

Wear Ed Hardy in public, ever, for any reason. I don’t care how Jersey you think you are. NO EXCUSES. Especially if it’s a *shudder* man tank.

Sport super-baggy oversized jeans. If I see this I’m going to pants you. And it’s going to be completely non-sexual and highly embarrassing. You’ve been warned.

….and threatened.

Wear a shirt tighter than that girl you wish was your girlfriend.

….I can see your nips.

Go out in mandals, ever.

Wear jean shorts. This is not the 80’s and you look like a douchebag.

Terrible sneakers = you’re sleeping alone tonight. …again.

Sport bad facial hair. Lip fur is an instant deal breaker, every single time.

Bad haircuts PAIRED with terrible facial hair.

Now, re-access, go fourth and womanize! I’m in your corner, rooting for you. Change is possible.

** Yes, I realize “undateable” is not actually a real word in the English language but has that stopped me before? No, the answer is a resounding and ear piercing NO.

Man Wednesday’s Silver Fox of the Week, Pierce Brosnan:

20 Apr

Mr. Bond, you are my pick for the Silver Fox of the Week. Do you accept your title with honor? HOTTUHH. I could fill this post with horrible “bond” and “007” puns, but for once I think I’m going to spare all of you and just fill this bad boy with fox pictures. Mr. Brosnan’s silver foxiness really speaks for itself. I am, for once, speechless. And also jet-lagged…. sad face.

…. Hot face.

Photo via JulHep

Photo via My Heart

Photo via IMBD

YouTube Tuesday: Dawson’s Creek, Ke$ha, Champagne and Unicorns.

19 Apr

A YouTube Febby but Goodie. A little dance dance for your Tuesday sadness.

On another note, check out Ke$ha without autotune after you watch this video for the 9 millionth time – it’s worth the Google; your ears will bleed. But! I admittedly have “Blow” on my iPhone and jam out to it in the car on the reg. Get over it, just so long as I don’t have to watch Ke$ha throw up gun hands one more time while I listen to it, I’m happy.  I also love van Der Beek’s pelvic thrusting. It’s a real panty dropper. …… UNICORNS AND LAZERBEAMZ.

Lookin’ Good, Lookin’ Svelte.

19 Apr

Since yesterday was the Boston Marathon, I bring you ladies: stylish workout gear. You’ll bag yourselves a meat head at the gym in .5 seconds. Holy incentive! Re-start that new years resolution or start training for next year’s marathon. I know I’m THINKING about it. That’s enough for now, right?

1. Nike Running Shorts, $96
2. lululemon Define Jacket, $99
3. Asics womens kayano runners, $214.50
4. OMG zebra print sports bra, $25
5. Pearl Izumi Aurora tank, $34.99
6. Nike Be Bold Athletic Capris, $50

My Summer 2011 Must Have Accessory List.

18 Apr

A short list of things I need RIGHT NOW:

…or else I’m going to just die inside. Just metaphorically die.

A pair of these spicy A.P.C  sunglasses. Preferably in brick red for maximum effect, but Turtle’s OK too.

Photo via APC.com

These Lanvin Wedges that will make me about 6 ft tall….Dream big, ehh, vertical! I am still thinking tall, TALL. They’re the stilts to fix my short.

Photo via Sunrainey.com

Chloe‘s bedazzled magical mini bag. The brighter I shine at night, the less likely I am to get lost… It’s a win win investment all around.

Photo via Watchesbee.net

This stunner peacock feather headband for my dome piece…. feather me happy.

Photo via Stylehive.com

One of these big brim black floppy hats to shield my face from the sun…wrinkles are no joking matter.

Photo via Polyvore.com

Another animal cocktail ring...a Fox friend for my Zebra! **

Photo via toxiferousdesigns.blogspot

A Rose Gold Watch…yellow gold is so last summer.

Photo via SSASYCHIC.com

Bye bye money, hello my new retail derived happiness. Shop on.

**Disclaimer: my co-author Sarah definitely needs this fox ring more than I do since “Foxy” is her legitimate street nickname and her birthday is coming up. HINT HINT! I can settle for the precious sapphire owl. What are friends for?

Photo via toxiferousdesigns.blogspot

1 Black Dress, 8 Looks.

15 Apr

Amigos, welcome to my closet / bedroom! Here I have taken a basic black cotton a-line tank dress from H&M and complied 8 different looks you can try for yourself with minimal accessories. All pieces have been listed on the photo by purchase spot. Basic black leather pumps are by Steve Madden.

All photos by Samantha Jo Hale. 

Here’s what we’re working with. Ignore my bemused faces. I am not photogenic and also pale. Yet, outfit ideas look best on real people. And thus, today I am a model  guinea pig of my own project. Work it till it hurts…. a lot.

Dress H&M, Flats For This 1 Photo Only, Steve Madden.

1. Out on the Town, Minxin’. Hopefully not with the same face as the one I’m making here. That face is not a real crowd pleaser, trust me.

Horsebit Leather Belt: Vintage via gift from my Mother, Sequin Clutch: Urban Outfitters

2. It’s Chilly Out and You Wore This Dress Last Week. You also have an affinity for chevron belts. Good for you, geometry is the spice of life! And so is purple.

Cardigan: Express, Belt: Urban Outfitters

3. Date Night. Folded Shirt Over Featured Dress = Illusion of a New Dress. Belt holds it all together. Oh Oh it’s Magic! YOU KNOWW.

Shirt: Forever 21, Belt: UrbanOutfitters, Mini Olive Bag: Longchamp

4. Belted Skirt Over Dress = Same Effect as Shirt Over Dress. A whole new outfit all over again, BAM. I think you just fooled somebody into thinking your wardrobe is bigger than it actually is. Congratulations. And no, it doesn’t matter that you can see the dress poking out from underneath. This adds to it’s chicness as it is all about the layering. But if it bothers you, hike that shit down. Make the look your own. I have no shame, obviously.

Skirt and Belt: Forever21

and look what it does!

5. This is Your Potential Attempt at Being Edgy, With Skulls. Well Done, Pirate. You could accessorize this look more with bangles or earrings but for the purpose of this example I wanted to focus on the skulls and a pop o’color.

Skull Scarf: Topshop


6. Animal Print Scarf and a Green Python Belt For the Casual Work Place, Haiii!

Scarf: H&M, Belt: J.Crew

7. Day Walker. I still continue to stand awkwardly in my heels. Charming. I’ll work on it for next time, pinky swear. Scout’s honor.

Hat: Urban Outfitters, Ivory Bangle: Vintage via my Grandmother

8. Minimal Glitz. At this point I believe my Starbucks wore off.  Hazardous. Poor Samantha, I am no fun. Whomp whompp. Myself, mug shot chic. With sparkles!

Silver Belt: J.Crew, Necklace: American Eagle Outfitters


The Glitz and my Chest. Lets call it a day, shall we?

Get a basic black dress of your own and try these for yourselves you fancy felines!